Focus

Focus.

It’s basically a word I hear every day. Do you ever think about how easy it is to get distracted? Sometimes I question my ability to live this life. I question most things. I even question why I question. A lot of times I end up laughing at myself doing all of this questioning. Yes, God doesn’t call the equipped, he equips the called. But at what point will I know that I’m equipped? I seem to feel equipped when I seriously need to know what I’m doing. God seems to become my mouth and become my hands right when I need it. Not a second sooner, not a second later. It feels like the moments in between are like finding the light switch in a dark room you’ve never been in before. Why is that I can’t give myself the advice I seem to have for others? This life feels iffy. Unstable. I know I’m following something so incredibly solid… so incredibly amazing that I feel inadequate even telling you about Him. But still, I think about what I’m doing and what God is calling me to, and I worry. I feel like that parent that’s in the passenger’s seat while his kid is driving for the first time. That parent would feel so much better if they could just take the wheel themselves, but they know they have to take the plunge. There’s a name for that, it’s not something I enjoy admitting, but it’s called insecurity.

                I feel different. I see a lot of people, what feels like most, who worry that God won’t take care of them. They worry that ends won’t meet and that the rain won’t stop. Then I see me, questioning myself. Having faith in God is such a high priority, but I beginning to think that not trusting yourself is almost as important. God is calling me and all of us to so much. It seems like such a huge standard. It seems like too much to even think about. Most days, I end up confused just from thinking. I get frustrated and flustered because it’s just too much… I’m trying to be a part of something so much bigger than myself that it’s frightening. At that moment, I don’t believe in myself. I don’t trust my own self to follow Him. I’ve seen myself stumble before, so why should I dare trying again? I’ll just mess things up. These are thoughts that haunt me in recent days.

                Focus. It’s an overused word. Think about how many times you hear it daily, weekly, monthly, whichever. I don’t know about you, but I hear it a lot. Mostly, it’s in the form of a command for me, because I’m not listening or paying attention to someone or a task I’m doing. We hear it so much in our daily lives. It’s a relative term. It doesn’t require a lot of thought when you hear it. But maybe it should. Maybe we should really, really think about what it truly means to focus. I feel a passion inside of me to promote this new way of thinking about this action – focusing. To focus is to put everything else aside and give full attention to something or someone. It means finding those stray thoughts and kicking them out. It means putting complete, number one, momentary priority on this one person or thing. For this time, this is all you’re thinking about. For this time, it’s all that matters. Everything else can wait. I could go on and on describing this action. The dictionary defines Focus as “a central point, as of attraction, attention, or activity.”

                What if we put this kind of intense focus on Christ? What if we put this kind of central focus on the work he’s given us? What if when we talked to God, we put this high priority, intent focus on absolutely nothing else, but Him? I get distracted with these thoughts of disbelief, these thoughts of second-guessing. Satan distracts me. He starts telling me that God made a mistake choosing me… that he shouldn’t trust me with this work. Those thoughts are not of Jesus. Jesus didn’t give me doubt. Imagine what life would be like if I was focused. Imagine how God could work in me and in you, if you and I… were focused. You see, when you’re focused, these thoughts of doubt and distrust aren’t there. When you focus, stray thoughts are not around. They have no place in a focused mind. I’ve found that when I focus on Jesus, I trust not only Him, but myself. Focus is extremely relevant to trust and faith. When you focus on your goal, your call, your God… you aren’t worried about ifs and buts, because you know your purpose and you have this trust about you. You have this attitude of “nothing else matters but what Jesus has told me.” Imagine your life – focused.